Going Korean for Dinner

decided to finaly try this korean restaurant that had a funny name.

since my friend S is into food trips as well, she agreed to come and figure out the menu that read mmmbops and sssmbops...or something like.

Kogi Bulgogi as the sign read is on the 2nd floor of the Eastwood Mall. their prices were unusually affordable.

they give you a range of appetizers here free of charge together with your dose of kimchi. it'll never be a korean resto if they don't serve such I guess. I got the beef wrap and some ramen. i totally forgot the name of what S ordered but it was one of those with the "bop" at the end and serves on a heated marble bowl.

verdict the "bop" dish turned out to be so delish and the ramen was well, nothing fancy. so I will make it a point to come back try out more of those "bop" dishes. great value too since it won't even be over the Php 300 mark together with drinks.

Resurrecting the Sharing Spirit

Oh dear, so much has happend in my life that I dont even know how to where to start. It seems that I have abandoned the art of my writing and that itself has killed part of my spirit that loves to share stories.

And so I shall get back on this road starting tomorrow. Either through my own personal ramdom clicks or by photos of others that just made my day, I want to start blogging again.

Then maybe in that small gesture I get to find my voice back.

State of Thankfulness

sometimes when things are not going the way we want it to be,
being thankful become a challenge.
the notes above I found on this blog
are Leah Dietrich's thank you notes
to anything and everything in her life

multi-tasking- good or bad?

so many things are simultaneously happening in my life. so many thoughts wanting attention that priority seems to be the consitent cry of all of them. i want to take a step back. but it seems that I don't have that luxury of time. to survive they say, we need to have the ability to multi-task.

doing 2 or more things simultaneously seem to be the norm in this generation. i take a vacation and try to squeeze in a day for meetings in that country, which makes me feel like so it was work after all. fix up a powerpoint while researching for the next presentation only to ask so which part was I in again. oh and last saturday's scheduled time out with a friend that I conveniently placed in eastwood so that it'll be easier to go to the office and turn in the time sheets. which ended up with me not seeing the friend at all because of the other emails that I had to check.

does it really have to be that way? can't we just do one thing at a time and make sure all efforts on it thus making it easier for us?

i am leaning on the side that people need to start unlearning the practice of multi-friggin-tasking. I feel that it robs us of savoring the learnings - be it the success or things to work on- of life. slowly we are forgetting what it is to focus. this lack of ability to be "in the moment" then trinkles down to other aspects of our lives- especially in relationships.

so for you is all about the quantity? Or is all about the quality of interaction?

Countdown to Happyness

9 days to go!!!

Scream!

There’s a weird feeling that comes after being screamed at in public.

A part of me wants to scream back.
A part that wants to just cry.
And the part that wins is for me to do the right thing and speak to him and get to the bottom of things.

Yes the proper thing is to take a step back and think things through. Although fighting back the tears is slowly draining the fight out of me.
I need to acknowledge that I could have something to deserve that to which I need to own up and maybe even say sorry.

A take away is introspection that if that happens to me what will be my initial reaction.

If there is anything I do want to talk to him and just sort through the emotions. I don’t have to suck it up to him. But I also know that things like this is a 2-way street and being the older one need to initiate better teamwork.

spoondoolicks crunching

yeah spoondolicks!
a new term I got off of our British IT guy
it means moolah or datung to us Filipinos.

a month has passed since I moved into my own place
and there is so much to absorb for me.
everyday I am learning how to schedule and recently budget.
I have a long way to go with being successful with the latter.

calculated risks and i'll get there..

Adjustments

new people means adjustments.

for a day I felt how it was to hate a person.
the way that person sounded, dressed up
and even how that person tapped on the desk when they wanted to make a point.

i have been feeling exhausted lately,
plus my sleep time is rationed to the point the my body is complaining.
So you giving more work just as I am about to leave the office,
doesnt really help.

when you talk to me, I can feel that nothing I do will ever be good for you.
I hope it's just my paranoia talking

so to you, I have nothing personal against you.
but I do hope that you realize that we need to make this relationship work.

You agitate me with all the lists and seemingly random solutions that you present.
so, i'll make the first step to adjust and will be praying that we can meet halfway.

A Not So Different Valentines Day

It has been 2 weeks since I packed all my things in boxes and moved in to my very own apartment. Things have been changing in my life since 2009 and the emotions are sliding the scale. Moving into a new home has by far been the biggest growing up move I have made.

Yes I feel like a big girl now. I’ve been telling those close to me that the Peter-Pan-me is growing up and I am both enjoying the journey and terrified as to what is in store for me.

Even my heart had gone through its own maturing. Last year I found myself finally letting go of a man that I thought I would do anything for. Like those people that had to give up addictions, I found myself with the need to constantly keep myself occupied. I had to be very busy; otherwise I feel the withdrawal symptoms would catch up with me. The need for constant movement was solved with focusing work. Auspiciously, it was here that I recognized that with the last man gone, my heart now had the space and the right prayer. So I heard 2 knocks on its door.

I responded and found 2 messengers that have unselfishly been sharing their stories and lives to me. The message being sent was never to lose hope. All was good until I found myself wanting too much.

Valentines this year, I thought would be different. That somehow the DreamGiver heard my prayer for a twist to the usual yearly moping. Yet here I am, sitting in my empty living room still alone.

Days back I wrote that I was giving my heart a week to take the lead. Done deal. Now my head will step in and decide on what will be better for the moment. I need to be able to function and with my heart in the driver seat I know I am bound to lose focus and the concentrate on the valuable balance I need.

I am not exclusively dating any of them and it hurts my head when I try to analyze what is actually happening. Or if there is more to the friendship that we have. All I know that at this point I should not give up the fight for love. There will be a someone and a family in my life. I should not lose faith in that promise.

As for Valentines, I need to steer clear of the notion that for it to be great I should have flowers or go out with someone. It should not be just about loving others; but is should also be about making sure you are capable of giving out love.

No more assumptions. No more doubts. But rather to just thankful for the blessing sent my way. I shall let myself enjoy each day, this way I can fill myself with more and more of that energy that makes me capable of sharing more of who I am to anyone that comes into my life.

So indeed a sincere Happy Valentines Day!

Praying for My Own Blueberry Girl

...Dull days at forty, false friends at fifteen;
Let her have brave days and
truth.
Let her go places that we've never been;
Trust and delight in her
youth.

Ladies of Grace, and Ladies of Favour,
And Ladies of Merciful
Night,
This is a prayer for a Blueberry Girl,
Grant her your Clearness
of Sight.

Words can be worrisome, people complex;
Motives and
manners unclear.
Grant her the wisdom to choose her path right,
Free
from unkindness and fear.

Let her tell stories, and dance in the rain,
Somersaults, tumble and run;
Her joys must be high as her sorrows are
deep,
Let her grow like a weed in the sun...

sometimes i forget...

that i am a free
to choose...
to dream...
to imagine...
to create...
and to achieve anything i put my heart to!













so i choose to remember!

guarded hearts

what is it you protect
behind this fortress of yours
that despite the months
you have still been comfortably cautious

i am on one-brick-window-basis of your life
gradual releases of your choices and journeys
pushing out a brick enough to peer through
and then putting it back in

i reckon exhaustion is setting in
of having kept these walls, years counting
so come rest your hand on mine,
and allow me to balm your wounds

hush, dear thinker
draw near and lay your weary head
all is well, your baggage is safe on my watch















that is if you let me

photos are from The Drifter and the Gypsy blog

our story to tell

now i know that I have an "emotional maturity dam"
its that "thing" that holds and controls my emotions
because of it the surges of anger or happiness can be...
uhmmm..."managed"

yesterday that dam cracked and control was shaky
but thankfully my dam was stronger than I thought
it was able to hold on with just a few spills here and there
otherwise it would have been a very bad situation for me

in times like this I do have to be grateful for something
if it wasn't for the circumstances, i wouldn't have had an "opportunity"
funny how i manage to put quotations in words that are more than what they seem
this is my dam in control - hehe

yes, yesterday i was given a peek into a beautiful mind
it was like taking a tour into a different universe
filled with supernovas, quasars and black hole
a journey of the past, present and the possible future

the drought of unrestricted natural conversations has ended
my thirst for enganging dialogues has been more than quenched
over a few rounds, sausage and a sansrival cake,
i was able to believe once again...

at the end of the day its not about how much "work" you have accomplished
but rather the relationships you have with people
the fulfilment that you have given something good in someone's life
and in turn add value to your existence

to "you" thank you...
for the time and the spontaneous exchanges of stories
in them I realized that we all have a story to tell
and in these tales we learn that our experiences are indeed the best teacher

a daily ritual

i am experiencing a new kind of dance.
because of it, the thirst for significance
and drama is quenched on a daily basis.
it gives me a longing to get up everyday
just to experience what the next episode is.
each day brings out new things,
the constant discovery of what we have in common.
it's cute in it's own cheezy way.
from therapy moments. to relationship set-up and today music.
i am looking forward to our conversations in the days to come.

maybe this is what I should learn,
to enjoy the daily revelations.
to be patient, and enjoy this ride.
spontaneous and unhurried.

so this prayer, Lord I say...
AMEN!

HOW...

despite the friends and their reassurrances
the family and their consitency
work and career to get busy with
why do we still feel alone?

at the end of the day
we wish there was someone
to rant to then cuddle
to cook for
share stories with
laugh and cry
or just be silly with
add in some snaps for documentation

sadly, what i thought was a simple part of life
has ended up to be wait...a very very long wait
for countless wandering wanderers

which makes me ask,
is there a shortage of the opposite sex?
do we go and search for love or wait for it to find us?
how do we distinguish a stupid risk from a risk that we need to do?
why does it seem so complicated, or was it us that made these complications?
im tired of asking, waiting and second guessing!!

can someone just tell us...how?

excuse me you're blocking my goal

I learned how to ride the bike
by looking straight into the distance
keeping my eye on a focal point --
the destination.

i had been walking a thin line
the past few months,
and what kept me balanced
was that I had my eyes on something.

today some situations
blocked my view of the destination
and I felt the cold panic
of falling to the ground.

step away from my goal please
your casting a shadow on it
and it's making it look dark
and it's not how it should be.

i need to be bright and inspiring
especially during these times,
so I can work at full capacity
despite all the odds!

August Rush

this month sems to be going by so fast
which works for me and my countdown
81 days till i go back to "my 2nd home"
yipee!

and i'm bringing people to come and join the fun
let's see if the legend stands true,
that once one has a taste of the waters of Sabah
that they'll keep coming back for more

at day's end

there's that wish
that each time I turn the knob
someone is waiting
with hugs and kisses
that brushes the day's pain away

that you would be there
cause today i came home
missing you terribly

sense in this madness

there is still a big question mark above all this
i don't know where things will take us
but i do know i am enjoying the new you
be safe and well is my daily prayer for you

hopefully there will be sense in our madness

no time

so much i want to write about
like my recent trip back to kota kinabalu
the new job that is really keeping me busy
or my new crushie with a face that will never look sad

i could also tell you about the realizations i've experienced
one being that my mind can walk away, my heart is holding on

so many many things
i just dont have the time!