i close my eyes...
and i can see the melody of the shore's colors,
made more vivid and clear by the sun's rays
i can taste the saltiness of the wind's breeze,
a reminder of healing and relaxation.

i am yearning for my sanctuary.
a place where i weave my dreams.
to meditate
to relax
to savour life
and invite healing.

i am taking the trip back to my heart...

You are an Ocean Beauty!
Like the ocean itself,
You are deep, complex, ever-changing,

Turbulent and chaotic,
Yet also calm and peaceful

Which Woman of Beauty Are You? Find out! By Nishi.

the orca needs the sea!

to once again be one with the ocean
to be in her habitat
a place where she feels she can be free

i am adrift in this ocean of life. where, akwardly, I know not what I truly feel. on most days I am happy and proud of where I am in my journey. yet on certain days when I am in solitude, I feel the insecurities creeping in and I hurriedly surround myself with the people I feel safe with.

what is causing this I do not know. but what I do know is that, when I fall into murky waters I will always surface feeling more confident that I will SURVIVE!

To me the greatest of all is still love. When we realize what it really is then we will all agree. What saddens me though is how people put restrictions to this beautiful experience. I myself am guilty of it. Not once but numerous times. It makes me all the more marvel about it, for it simply says that love can never be defined by words, emotions or by certain outcomes that we believe was a result of being in love.

Love, like all other beautiful things, is not just felt…it is experienced. It not merely for our companion in life, but for those that we deem our treasures in this world, our family, friends, and memorabilia that seems to bring back the days gone by. It could even be for things we find fulfillment in doing.

Love is also a verb. An experience we can give to the relationships that matter. It exists in each one of us. Clouded by how majority of the world sees it as. But when each one of us can tap into this great passion, then we find a different satisfaction to situations where we can share this experience.

Judge me as being too positive, and I will tell you that I myself thought love has given me pains and scars, at times even saline soaked eyes, sleepless nights and a fear of its shadow. Yet when I find time alone and ponder on what has been, I realize that it has but given me strength in every way, in facing tomorrow, in being able to give more of it the next time and of grasping how to make each relationship matter.

Life seems meaningless if we do not set our hearts and minds to achieving something when the light of it is to be put out. For me life is about the legacy of the relationships that one has fostered. And love is about making each one extraordinary.

So to those that have led me to this awareness and proven how achievable it is, gratitude to you from my hearts depth. To my family that expresses love in an unusual way. To my two eternal sisters, Ann and Jejee, for not letting distance and lifestyle hinder the bond that will always exist within us. To my soul sisters, who take no fear in making me see the possible outcomes of my decisions, but still understanding that I need to learn from each encounter. To friends that despite chaotic careers manage to sense when I need them. To two unexpected friends (Kenner and Jun), for making me realize the balance of work and play, long live Gemini personality! To the messengers that the Great Spirit has sent to remind me that I will find that one man in the opportune moment. To this place I will always call my home, where my Orca spirit can be one with the water and my soul refreshed and renewed.

I continue to pray that everyone may be able to experience this kind of life. Not a life that seem to be perfect, but one that acknowledges how to cope through the tough times and still be able to deal with the frustrations along the way. For then we make life worth it. Blessed be.