Stranger Encounter

came home to trekkers lodge one night, the place I called home in kota kinabalu (kk), and saw kenny with his uncle. they got themselves a room there while his uncle was in town. naturally they invited joel and me for a few round of beers. i willingly said, "sure."

itay and kenny gave up on us early since they both had to be up early for work. so I was left drinking with a complete stranger which actually concerned me a bit. but after thinking that I was "at home" anyway then I refilled my glass and continued on the discussion.

as we emptied our tiger beers we found ourselves discussing about life. it spun off from the mere question of why I was in kk. hmmm...good question. something that people have asked and I cant really seem to find an answer. my staple response was "I just felt like I had to do this trip." which was true for me.

we compared our cultures, shared about our travels around the world (just south east asia for me though) and even discussed about love. in the middle of one of our conversations he suddenly just stopped. he took a gulp of his beer, then with all the english he could muster said, "i not know you very long, but i feel you come to kk to look for something...have you find it?"

i was frozen. here was a man that i just met and he asks me a loaded question. snapping out of the shaken state I told him, "yes I did, but for me its letting the experience reveal where I should be headed," to which he replied "i think you looking for love here." what did he just say?? I wanted to shout and say "OF COURSE NOT!" but that would be lie.

i may say that finding love wasn't the main concern for the trip. but it still was a reason. no sense defending myself to a guy that seems to be able to read me. but this is not why I am writing about this experience. after being quiet and him feeling the apprehension, he went on to say the statement the made rethink the days to come.

"you are like playing football, you kick and kick the ball. but to where you don't know. now you are tired. you look for love but you dont know what you want to find, because you dont have a goal," was what he said.

part of me wanted to scream at him and tell me my views on letting the universe open up the opportunities for me. but somehow that was just wow-i-couldnt-say-anything-cause-its-partly-true moment for me.

if that was a friend or a person from my family that said it I would been in red alert defensive mode. but coming from a mere stranger. that was just wow! a bitter sweet dose of reality. i wanted to hug him, but remembered I was in a country that could easily misinterpret that. so I just stuck out my hand and told him, "that was most candid assessment of my life and I thank you for verbalizing it for me."

i may never see him again but he will always be a man that slapped me back to a dream-reality-balance.

so am I kicking the ball towards a goal now? i can say yes. my field may be small and the goal make-shift, but definitely worth the baby steps.

have I found love? hmmm...next topic please....