to a wife, from his friend

Dear Mrs. HisWife,

I met with your husband last night.

Please don’t think wicked of it. We only had a drink and it wasn't even alcoholic. Just a friendly catch up between friends was all it was. We animatedly talked about what has happened in a year. The sport , the people and trivial things. We also talked about where life has taken us.

And as I listened to him talk about his business heartaches and dreams I wanted to go up to you, stretch out my hand to show appreciation. This time he didn't leave you out of the conversation. He proudly told me about what you have been doing. The career change with a side note of how similar our jobs are now. Plus you wanting him home early every night, making sure he doesnt become a workaholic (he needs to be reminded every chance you get).

Thank you for slowly being part of his life. For being there during the moments that really matter to him. For taking the step to alter situations so that he can feel that someone supports him. Last night I felt that he finally feels that he has someone.

He is a great guy and I know that it is something that you also know. All he needs is for someone to tell him that every now and then. Things don't have to be serious all the time. Take time to act silly and let go of sophistication...you'll see how his eyes light up like that of a child.

His heart has been broken by business deals and some people he thought were friends. I dont want bitterness to be part of such a beautiful heart. I'm leaving soon and all he has is you.

Please continue being in the boat with him. He chose you to be his wife. I am only an emergency raft which exists in a parallel universe called friendship. I am aware that between our worlds are boundaries...I will respect that.



In good faith,


Your husband's # 1 friend

the other woman

but the other woman will always cry herself to sleep
the other woman will never have his love to keep
and as the years go by
the other woman
will spend her life alone

- jeff buckley

hearing the song

she told herself maybe she was the other woman
cause she did -without loosing her sense of self - what she could do to be near him
cause she rationalized his goodness beyond what it probably was
cause she wanted to show him how much bigger the world is

and then she sang the song again
and realized

she didn’t want to be alone
she wanted to take her own children to the beach
or have a kitchen that will let her make them almond-walnut pancakes
or have someone who she can talk to about her dreams
and who would, in turn tell her his

so she let him go

but what really stung her was
how through all this
he did make her feel like the other woman
because for the last time she thought
maybe he was fine where he was
maybe to him he needed someone who was nearer
maybe he had to settle into what was convenient
maybe he will be happy

cause that's all she wants for him --- to be happy

in a 10-year relationship

I have this guy in my life,

aside from my dad
we met for 10 minutes back in 1998
and has grown the relationship for 10 years to date
so far the longest of all the series of unfortunate men in my life,

pun intended

he’s has been part of all the significant dramas

in my life after highschool
and has accepted my quirks and screws loose, and i his
we can handle talks while we “tusok-tusok” the fishball
to sipping wine and discussing about art history or van gogh

they say that even the stars agree to our being together
i am Gemini, he is Sagittarius
complimentary in almost everyway
he holds the line at times while i breathe,

and i hold it up when my turn comes
we have our silly competitive contests

where the scores are never remembered
our daily highlights and lowlights

and a knack for being able

to laugh at one another’s “ngak” moments

anything, anywhere, anyone we can take on
though we can even by ourselves
but we can be better if we combine our powers

about a year and a half ago we made a decision
to take the next step in our lives and move into the same house
this time we take the practice of conjugal property to another level
there a days he buys the food and there are days that he gets lazy and i take over
there are days we are excited to talk about life, and days stretching out to weeks
that we just go our own separate ways for a breather

we talk about other relationships we have or have had, the escapades and charades
and though at times we do get jealous, i know he’ll never own up to it
so we just continue sharing our life and the journey towards what we call dreams
this has just been great for me all this time,
i can very well say, if relationships were this mature,
then maybe some companies will go out of business
and the world can be a much better place

so to those that know me you know who he is

he is my will and i am grace
together we are always on the lookout for the next gorgeous man
so we can stare, giggle and make our own kind of fun
and yes...
he is....*giggles*

and that’s what makes the friendship just divine!


__ ___ ___

postscript. I just learned that someone in his family believes that we are really are a we-will-be-married-soon-enough-kind of couple. I had a hearty laugh hearing about that. he said maybe we should get engagement rings too. I can’t blame them for thinking though, it’s the best relationship set-up i’ve had. I love u tag...to infinity and beyond...